You will also be a crown of beauty in the hand of the LORD, and a royal diadem in the hand of your God. It will no longer be said to you, “Forsaken,” nor to your land will it any longer be said, “Desolate;” But you will be called “My delight is in her,” and your land, “Married;” For the LORD delights in you, and to Him your land will be married … And they will call them, “The holy people, the redeemed of the LORD;” And you will be called, “Sought out, a city not forsaken.” Isaiah 62: 3-4, 12, NASB
Is that passage not beautiful? The promise of these words … God’s words … stand so joyfully on their own that I am tempted to say, “Amen” and call it a post. My tiny, insignificant insight appears so meager in the light of God’s love. Yet it is because of His love that I have any insight to share. It is because of His promise that I have a message. It is because of His redemption that I have hope.
He wants me to offer that hope to others. Yet, I feel incredibly unworthy.
And Jesus said to him, “If you can? All things are possible to him who believes.” Immediately the boy’s father cried out and said, “I do believe; help my unbelief.” Mark 9:23-24, NASB
This has become my prayer: “I do believe! Help my unbelief!” I struggle daily with the knowledge that my history is beyond tainted. The battle rages in my heart and mind between the TRUTH God has put before me and the past I long to put behind me. Doubts plague my mind. If my life is on display for the world to see, what if they only see what I used to be? What if they judge? What if they don’t understand? What if they just don’t care? What if they believe I don’t deserve God’s mercy? (What if I don’t believe it?) I have heard the cliches such as, “God can take your mess and make it a message.”
What if I don’t want Him to?
Wow. That is what it boils down to … am I willing to allow my Savior to use my story? Once again, my eyes are opened to these words:
It’s not about me.
It’s not about my mistakes; it’s about His forgiveness. It’s not about my disgrace; it’s about His grace! It’s not about my terrible, heart-wrenching, ridiculously wrong choices. It is about Him. It’s about Jesus. It’s about the cleansing work He did in my life. And friend, if He can forgive me, He most certainly will forgive you.
Instead of your shame you will have a double portion, and instead of humiliation they will shout for joy over their portion. Isaiah 61: 7a, NASB
We do not have to feel humiliated any longer by the sins of the past. God has forgiven us. He makes all things new. If we trust Him and hold tight to His promises, then we have no choice but to surrender our lives to Him. Willingly. Completely.
I am no longer forsaken. I am a crown of beauty in the hand of the LORD.